Keep the faith

Tuesday night my Mom called to let me know that Grandpa was in the hospital.

Wednesday I booked a flight.

Thursday afternoon I left the kids at a kind friend's home, got a ride from the next-door neighbor to the airport, and came on my way.

I spent much of Friday in the hospital with Grandpa.

Today he moved back to the fabulous care facility where he has been since November--the same home in which Grandma spent her last year. Hospice came in. They've been so kind. And the people who work in the care home love Grandpa too and care so lovingly for him.

The hospice nurse let us know at about 11:30 this morning that she felt he probably only had a few hours. Yet he hung on all day. Tonight at 9 PM we held family prayer and left. He is comfortable and peaceful, and though I wanted to stay with him to hold on, I think he would have prefered to have a bit of space.

I know he's not alone, not just because those in the care home love him and will check in, but because I know Grandma, Aunt Kathy, his parents, and his siblings are all looking forward to having him with them again.

But I'll still miss him. I can't imagine him not being just a phone call away, to listen to all I have to share, provide encouragement, and remind me to "Keep the faith."

I love you Grandpa, and I'm deeply grateful that I could be home to hold your hand, even if you couldn't tell me that you loved me too. After a lifetime as your granddaughter, I know without words how you feel about me, and I'll make you proud.

I'll keep the faith.

Recommended reading

Can you believe my little girl is so old?


She was recently in a Girl Scout fashion show and I let her wear a touch of lip gloss, bronzer, and mascara so she wouldn't be drowned out in lights.


Anyway, now that the Actress is 10, she is reading more and more books I'm unfamiliar with...which means I've been getting familiar with more and more new books.

If you like fantasy, I thought I'd pass on the top three series I've more recently discovered along with her:


1. The Secrets of the Immortal Nicholas Flamel by Michael Scott


2. Fablehaven by Brandon Mull


3. Sisters Grimm by Michael Buckley

They do get intense in places, and I would not recommend them for kids younger than ten or twelve, but I found them rather enjoyable and so did she. I like knowing what my kids are reading. It provides for meaningful conversations and connections between us, and puts me in a position to discuss some of the more difficult themes with her and help her process them.

For good measure, I'll recommend one more which could be enjoyed by children probably as young as eight:


The Theodosia series books by R.L. LaFevers

Happy reading!!!

On reasons why I love this boy...

Because he says things like, "I wish we had an alligator. And then if I had a real sword I would fight him."


And, "I wish I were a real ninja. In this world."

The Magic of Two

The tantrums aren't my favorite part, but two year olds are so full of life and wonder that I can't help but adore this phase.


This one is particularly full of it. Darling, but she can't be trusted.


Yesterday Princess was standing on the bar in the basement getting her groove on. A friend of mine told her to get down. With a resounding "no" she explained that she was "shaking her bootie." I usually get "No. Never." And then I intercede.


A few weeks ago a friend of the Actress taught Princess this most marvelous joke:

"Guess what?"

"What?"

"Chicken butt?"


I don't even let the kids use that word...I insist on bum or rear end as I think the other term is a bit rude. As it is, for a pint-sized peanut Princess has a HUGE voice. And she laughs outrageously when she thinks she's funny. So we all laugh, and the vicious joke cycle continues.

Sigh.


If only she could stay this little forever.

The Reveal of the BIG PROJECT!!!

If I were to list the top six things my mother taught me to do they would be (in no particular order):

1) become educated, through school and as a lifelong learner,

2) be consistent in attending church and the temple,

3) always do your best,

4) you can have anything you want in life if you are willing to pay the price with your hard work and determination,

5) work like it all depends on you and pray like it all depends on the Lord, and

6) serve others, which is the one I want to focus on. My mother is the quiet anonymous giver. She has done so many little things for people over the years without expecting anything from them in return...many times the people didn't even know it was her that had provided for their needs.

In many ways my mom and I are not alike, and my means of serving may not be her means of serving, but she taught me how to serve because she brought me along to serve with her. We visited the convalescent hospital and widows who needed a little sunshine in their lives. And she told me little stories about things she had done for people which she wouldn't want repeated, but which taught me nonetheless.

I will continue and expand on her example in my own lift, and pass along this legacy of service to my own children.

So without further adieu, I post a copy (with edits to protect our identities a bit) of the email I sent out to many many of our friends and relatives today:

My Dear Friends,

We need your help. Our family has embarked on a service adventure, spearheading a series of fantastic charity projects to benefit children. In case you couldn’t tell, I really love children and this year I want my children to serve side by side with Mr. Bloomers and me and our friends and neighbors as we proactively assist some wonderful organizations to serve children in need.

I know many of you already volunteer in a number of ways, and we think that’s awesome. We hope you will have the time and/or money to join with us, and that at the very least, you will spread the word to your friends, sports teams, churches, and to anyone who can help. No volunteers will be turned away, but in order to keep our efforts coordinated, please keep us updated on how you’ve chosen to help.

So what’s on the Wilson Family Charity agenda so far?

May 6th-7th: [Our] Family Charity Great American Bake Sale held at Walgreens 2-7 PM Friday, and 9-4 PM Saturday

• Our children are so blessed, yet nearly 1 in 4 kids in America faces hunger. Share our Strength is working to change that. Read more about it here: http://gabs.strength.org/

• How you can help: spread the word, solicit local businesses for donated goods, bake goods yourself or with your children, work the sale, purchase from the sale, spread the word online (as we will have an online donation page sending calorie-free virtual cupcakes!) and pray for good weather and for those giving and receiving.

• All money raised will go directly to Share our Strength to aid them in the work of feeding hungry children in America.

Late summer-early September: [Our] Family Charity School Kits Drive

• Our children have an abundance of the tools needed for learning, yet so many children have a great desire to learn and don’t even own a pencil. LDS Philanthropies collects humanitarian aid supplies and school kits to help those in such a circumstance. See page 5 for school kit guidelines: http://www.ldsphilanthropies.org/humanitarian-services/patterns/service-project-guidelines.pdf

• How you can help: spread the word, purchase school supplies according to the guidelines (we’ve targeted the timeline of back-to-school sales), donate fabric for the bags, help sew the bags, aid in assembling the kits, and pray for those donating and receiving.

• All completed kits will be donated to LDS Philanthropies for distribution around the world, primarily to schools and orphanages and also as part of disaster relief upon occasion. One thing I love about LDS Philanthropies is that it is a volunteer organization with all costs covered by The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Monetary and in kind donations are used 100% for relief of those in need.

November 12th 2-4 PM: Feed My Starving Children session reserved for [Our] Family Charity

• According to the website: Feed My Starving Children is a Christian organization committed to “Feeding God’s Starving Children Hungry in Body and Spirit.” If you have ever been to help, you have felt of the great spirit of this organization as they seek out hungry children across the world and feed them, one little bagged meal at a time. To learn more, visit: http://www.fmsc.org/

• How you can help: spread the word, let me know that you would like to volunteer (as we can take the first 85 to respond), donate to the organization and/or collect donations, and pray for those both giving and receiving.

• All monetary donations for the event will go to Feed My Starving Children. Each volunteer will pack approximately $52 worth of food. I would love for us to cover as much of that as we can ourselves and we would be happy to take along any donations you have collected even if you cannot attend.

Time and place TBD: [Our] Family Charity Talent Show and Book Drive

• More information to follow.

Last month I was privileged to volunteer again at Feed My Starving Children where I learned that FMSC will host your birthday party group. That sounds like a fabulous party to me! Unfortunately I was too late to book a party for my birthday next month, but the thought snowballed for me as I realized that I will turn 33. This was the age of our Savior Jesus Christ when he completed his mortal ministry and took upon himself the sins and sorrows of the world. He was crucified and resurrected and I know He lives. And I feel compelled to follow His example in a bigger way this year. He taught, “Suffer [or allow] the little children to come unto me, and forbid them not: for of such is the kingdom of God” (Mark 10:14). How can I better serve Him than to take care of his children and invite others to join me?

Though we volunteer as Christians, we believe that good works are good works regardless of religious beliefs or affiliations. We welcome all volunteers. We hope and pray that you will consider these projects and determine how you can help us bring relief to wonderful children who need us.

Warmly,

Mr. Bloomers, Kristin, The Actress, The Artist, Little Mommy, Max, and Princess

PS I will be sending future emails to this list about these projects (though I promise not to clutter your inbox). If you would not like to be included in future emails please let me know. Also, if you know of someone who would like to be added to the list, please send me their email address.

Seven principles for making family dinners work for you and your family

Does sitting down for dinner as a family really matter? Does it matter what you eat? What you talk about? How long you sit?

Study after study has shown the benefits of the family dinner, from reducing the likelihood that teens will have substance abuse problems, to accounting for higher grades and more responsible behavior. Yet in today’s fast-paced hectic world how does a mom bring the family together for a sit-down meal?

If you’re like me, you entered marriage without any meaningful training on how to be a homemaker. We ate a lot of takeout and microwave meals during my childhood, often taking them to our bedrooms to eat alone in front of the TV. Imagine how overwhelming it was for me to face pulling the family together to plan, prepare, and eat dinner in unity? Add five young children and a husband who works long hours to my inexperience and it seemed a daunting task.

It’s taken patience and practice, but I’ve made it work. And if I can do it, so can you . . . if you follow these seven simple principles: (1) make it a priority, (2) plan ahead, (3) involve the kids, (4) be fully present, (5) have meaningful conversations, (6) set the example, and (7) make it fun.

1) Make it a priority: When you make family dinner a priority you send a clear message to your children that they matter and that family unity matters. Children appreciate the routine and stability of knowing that the family—parents and children—will eat together every day. Even if only part of the family can be there due to work or other demands, move forward and stick to the routine.

2) Plan ahead: Plan your menu in advance. Simple meals are okay. Remember protein, whole grains, and lots of fruits and veggies. The healthiest foods for your family are those that are the least processed. These are usually found towards the outer walls of the grocery store. Think real potatoes rather than potatoes in a box, brown rice over Rice-A-Roni, and fresh chicken breasts over processed chicken nuggets. Frozen fruits and veggies are nutritionally equivalent to fresh. Web sites such as allrecipes.com offer loads of tried-and-true (and simple) ideas. Plan the weeks’ meals with your calendar, assigning simple or crockpot meals to busier days.

3) Involve the kids: Give each child one or two days per week to help plan the menu and let them be your special helper that day. As they get older they can take more responsibility, doing most or all of the meal preparation on their own. Most ten year olds can use the oven with good oven mitts. Most eight year olds can measure ingredients independently and wash fruit. Most five year olds can peel zucchini and dump premeasured ingredients. Most two year olds can help set the table by laying out forks, spoons, or napkins. Our family rule is we sit and eat until we’re done and then each person clears his or her own plate, putting it into the dishwasher if possible.

4) Be fully present: Set the expectation that all members of the family be at the table with the family. Electronic devices, books, and toys are not invited, and ignore the phone if it rings. The successful family dinner is not simply about eating at home at the same time, it’s about strengthening family bonds. Being fully present is crucial.

5) Have meaningful conversations: Ask the children about their favorite parts of the day. Ask them to share what they learned that day that they didn’t know before. Tell them something you learned. Share world events. Do not feel like you need to talk down to them. Use sophisticated language when appropriate, stopping to define words as necessary. You’ll stretch their minds. Recite poetry. Tell stories. Ask them all to share their favorite color, or food, or what they want to be when they grow up. Engage one another. And don’t forget to listen. Truly listen to what other family members have to say. You might learn something new or at least something new about your child or spouse.

6) Set the example: If you want your children to eat their veggies, eat yours first! If you want them to focus on you when you are speaking, focus on them when they speak, and expect other family members to do the same. If you want your children to speak with kindness and respect to each other and to you, take the lead and show them how it’s done. Though it may seem trite and too often repeated, example does speak louder than words.

7) Make it fun: Family dinner is supposed to be fun, not stressful! Be flexible, and change it up sometimes. Eat cold cereal and fruit smoothies by candlelight. Build a fort with four chairs and a fitted king or queen size sheet and eat hotdogs, bananas, and smores inside. Have a finger foods theme, or celebrate more obscure holidays, like Dr. Suess’ birthday.

The best laid plans don’t always go as planned. Sometimes the children argue through the whole meal. Sometimes the chicken gets burned. Sometimes you just run out of time and energy and the best you can do is PBJ. Don’t sweat it. Consistency matters and it will pay off. You’ll have a stronger, more unified family and the rewards will be well worth your effort.

***So we really do eat dinner as a family, but apparently I don't take pictures of it. Just pictures of outrageous desserts. :)

I could use the jaws of life about now...

So tonight Mr. Bloomers and I attended a little attorney/client dinner event. (Special thanks to Aunt Stephanie for taking over tonight and putting up with the sassy girly attitudes of the children who think they know everything.)

Anyhow, the first difficulty of an event like this is: WHAT DO I WEAR? The dress code was business casual/cocktail attire. What does the slash even mean? Which is it?Can I wear pants? Should I wear a dress? A skirt?

And since the more fashionable clothing in my closet seems to have recently shrunken down a couple of sizes, this was an even bigger dilemma. I am practical over fashionable, though I do try to maintain a facade that I'm pulled together (amazing what a necklace can do). I really didn't want to go shopping for this dinner, but after trying on some items in the closet, I realized that I was going to have to cave.

This week only allowed for a quick in and out at Kohl's. I bought nearly $400 worth of stuff, at Kohls's prices people. That is a whole lot of pieces. Surely I would have picked up something that would be within the dress code and fit decently. Surely.

I came up with one sweater out of the whole lot.

Since wearing only a sweater seemed a bit risque, I delved back into the closet. Fortuneately there was one dress that would be acceptable if paired with the new sweater. Whew.

But here's the clincher: At the risk that this confession will make me seem all Oprah with the yo-yo body weight, I'm sporting a couple of belly rolls at this time. And I could only pull this outfit together if I tamed said belly rolls. So I did.

Control top nylons. Body shaping tank top. Body slimming slip.

By the end of the dinner I was feeling so compressed that I think my internal organs are bruised. I confided in Mr. Bloomers about the secret of my pain and suffering during the drive home. At this point, I don't know if I will even be able to get out, which is why I'm still dressed nearly two hours later.

Ah, the price of beauty! On the bright side, Gibson's grills some truly brilliant filet mignon. And the company turned out to be very pleasant too.

If I could only breathe properly, all would seem right in the world.